So, here I sit on a Friday morning at my computer. I've been enjoying my morning, talking to God, working in the yard, contemplating my future here on this earth. I have struggled the past 2 weeks and have really been fighting God about something----returning to a full time teaching position. So, you may wonder why the big deal?
I will be coming out of retirement and going back into the workforce FULL TIME. I have worked part-time this past year which I know God planned. Now, it has turned into a full time position. I'm excited in that I know I will be doing whatever God has planned for me, but at the same time it doesn't "fit" into what I imagined. That's not unusual at all, because if there's one thing I have learned about God it is this: He never does things the way I think he will. He's always full of surprises and he loves surprising me. His ways are a lot better than my own. But, I still have questions and I know he will answer them in HIS time--not mine.
Here are a few of the questions:
Didn't God tell me I could retire?
Yes, he was kind enough to give me "time off" to prepare me for "going back". ;-) God DOES have a sense of humor. He even opened a door this year which allowed me to go back on a part-time basis to get my feet "wet" and prepare me for the next step. I am very grateful for the doors that God opens and closes. I am very grateful that he knows what is best for me, he knows what I need in spirit, mind, and body. He is such a good and loving God.
Didn't God say I have greater things for you to do?
Sometimes my mind gets wrapped around what I want and not what God wants. To me, greater things (in my mind) are ministering to people in Africa, claiming territory for the Kingdom of God, being sent to another country to do God's work,etc. But to God, ministry takes places in so many places--in the home, the workplace, the marketplace----everywhere we WILL ALLOW IT! So, I feel that I am being "sent out" to minister to the children, teachers, support staff, and administrators through acts of kindness, love, encouragement, and individual ministry.
Didn't God say he is my provider?
God has taken care of us the past 2 years by helping us with our finances, but the first year I retired was hard. (In case you don't know, teacher retirement in Tennessee is the "pits") My husband's business had been run into by an Averitt Express truck. We decided not to sue, and they never settled with us, so we had to "eat" the costs or reestablishing a business, hiring extra employees, etc. But despite these difficulties, God always met our needs. There were times when the money was very "close". We learned to trust in God.
I told God I needed a part time job that would pay well and be enjoyable. The door was opened for a part time Title I Math position where I worked for 30 years. Then I would question God? Are you sure this is what I am supposed to do? Looking back, I know God probably wanted to whack me over the head and say, "Look, you asked for a job, here it is, it pays well, so open your eyes and take the job!" Which, of course, I did and am very glad!!! It was a very rewarding job and will turn into a full-time position next year.
What I have learned about God being Provider: He provides jobs and opportunities for us to earn our way in life. Isn't that part of him preparing us to be good citizens and to interact with others? He doesn't just give us everything, we have to work for it. I can remember as a child having the same dream over and over. I would be digging in the dirt and find coins--lots of coins. I've never gone out and found money in the dirt, never found a treasure chest full of money or jewels, never been left a huge estate, or been rich. And, at this point in my life, that isn't one of my desires. All I want is to be comfortable and sow into God's kingdom. To me that is the greatest wealth and riches I could ever desire.
So, I accept the path God has laid before me---to walk where he wants me to go, doing his work, doing his will, and doing it with excitement and joy and always embracing what is placed before me!
In HIS Steps
Judy
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